Since I love to pretend I’m Thai and not plan anything, or think about anything too hard, I just attempted to jump on a bus on a Friday afternoon to make the 4 hour journey to Sukhothai. Which, thanks to Sutham (Alex), was perfect. I walked riiiight onto a direct bus just as the doors were closing.
Unfortunately, this meant that I didn’t have time to hit the toilets. Which proved to be a problem, since the one on the bus was out of order.
DAMMITDAMMITDAMMITDAMMIT.
About .5 hours into the trip, I was ready to pee. 1 hour in, I was in pain. By the 90 minute mark I was sizing up my nearly full water bottle, trying to figure out how the hell I was going to pee into it without anyone noticing.
Just around the time I started looking for a way to jump off the bus without getting killed, we stopped. For longer than it takes a person to get on or off.
With my legs firmly pressed together from groin to knee, I wobbled up from the last seat on the bus to the front, knocking into sleeping senior citizens all the way up.
No bus driver.
Pai nai? (Where you go?)
Out of pure desperation, I hang out the door screaming HONG NAAAAAM!!! (Bathroom). A group of nice looking gentlemen, who I assume are with the bus company, point in two totally different directions. Excellent.
After some discussion I’m led to the nicest bathroom I’ve seen in a while. It was beautiful even. Gorgeous. Heaven.
Business time.
Of course I trip over the cord of a floor lamp and send it flying as I exit. Naturally. Because I’m slick like that.
As I roll out of the building, the nice gentleman hands me a banana. In a manner that makes me feel that I should ALWAYS get a banana for going to the bathroom. In fact, I think I will address this again at a later time.
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